The sun, the autumn leaves, the feeling of everything so miraculous just falls apart without me even noticing. I wish that I could fix everything. One thing in particular, but I will come back to that later.
Fall was here, but it feels like winter though. All I feel is coldness. Darkness. Loneliness. The truth is, that I didn't feel like this before. Before... well before something happened. That thing... is something terrible. Something I never want to mention, but if i never mention it, then you won't know what it is I am talking about, so here is the story: It was like any other day, I was studying my Geography in my bedroom when my mom comes in.
"Hey, Madison, do you have a moment?" my mom asked and sat down on my bed.
"Sure, what's going on?" I asked. She hesitated. I saw sadness in her eyes, that made me worried and uncomfortable.
"Well, sweetie. This is a very hard thing for me to tell you," she paused.
I was silent. She went on, "But... Connor's mom called me..." I froze. Why would Connor, my best friend in the whole world since kindergarten call my mother?!
"He, um..." she was very hesitant. I patiently waited for her to get it out. But I was also very nervous. I noticed tears started to form in her eyes... why was she crying?!
"Madison," she touched my leg, "Madison...Connor has cancer," I shifted away from her... "Cancer?!" I was hypervenelating. "Wh..why?! Why does he have cancer?! When did this happen?!" I started to cry.
"His mom just called me before I came in your room to tell you. They found out while he was in the hospital yesterday," my mom tried to calm me down.
I dreaded to ask this, "...What kind of cancer?" She hesitated again.
"...He has.. he has brain cancer," the words floated around in my head...brain cancer.
The tears that rolled down my cheeks were like fireballs, one after the other.
My mom gave me a tissue, "I'll leave you alone to think about this, if you need anything just tell me, alright?" I nodded and she left.
I sat there. Ten minutes. An hour, not moving. Pondering whether to see Connor or not. I decided that I would see him when I think it is right.
I will see him tomorrow.
:( THIS IS SOO SAD
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